You can't make this stuff up!!

OK.... so before I completely forget this story... I HAVE to share it. First a little back story to fill you in. We recently put cat doors in so that our six cats could explore and hopefully learn to use the yard.... or even a distant neighbors yard to poop in. OK ... even further back in time... we cast out one of our cats because she insisted on peeing on pillows and rugs and in the bathroom sink. So, we put a feeder up in the yard by the shed she hung out at. Well this attracted a bunch of strays. Before long we were not only feeding our 6 cats but 5 adult strays and 4 stray kittens. Steve's fear had become reality. Our six kitties had turned into 15, and he just knew I would adopt them all. Fortunately I was aware that this would be a problem, because we not only have annoying neighbors, but we have puppy and cat killing neighbors and a stray cat colony forming near them would be all the excuse they would need to start trapping and euthanizing or worse they could just resort to their old standard... poison. Now this isn't the story I have to tell, but it does explain some of the behavior. Last night I decided to go for a brief visit to my neighbors Tony and Donna. I left JR and Steve watching TV.... bellies full from some delicious baked fish and sweet corn on the cob. It was nice talking to adults for a change and not having a 4 yr old interrupting. Around 8:45 I said goodbye and headed home. From down the hill, our home looked so peaceful and almost shimmered with a golden glow from a few lit lamps. I walk in the back door and see Steve just staring wide eyed and JR almost hidden beneath a blanket. Then Steve starts this story. Apparently, JR thought it necessary to open the patio gate so that Dash our German Shepherd could go find me. Well Dash ran off.... somewhere. By the time Steve knew Dash was gone, he was really gone. Jr was exiled to the sofa and sat crying for fear Dash would get killed by a car or stolen, while Steve went looking for him. Nowhere to be found Steve returned home only to have Dash come running in moments later. I'm unsure of this next part, but what I got out of it, was this. They went upstairs for some reason... I believe it was to use the bathroom, when JR calmly points out the orange kitten to Steve. That would be the WILD orange kitten that's now fluffed up, hissing and ready to fight because it's trapped in a house where it doesn't belong. Steve sent JR into the bathroom and told him to close the door while he attempted to extract the cat..... Since the poor little kitten tried to shred his hand when he reached for it, Steve found a stick instead and chased the cat down the steps. Scared out of its mind the poor little kitty pooped alllllll the way down the steps and out the door with Steve right behind it. Before he could get back in to clean up the mess, Dash, who's not allowed upstairs, had already finished eating all the cat poop. So Steve gets JR from the bathroom and back to the couch they go. Now I'm hearing this story and it's almost unbelievable.... I was only gone for an hour maybe two. I tried really hard not to laugh, and I'm sure had I been the one looking for Dash or getting scratched up by a wild kitten I'd have been furious, but come on.... you can't make this stuff up! I really need to set up video cameras so one day I can win the big money! Of course, now I'm setting our live trap. I have to relocate 9 strays to a new neighborhood or better yet to a rescue where they'll make sure they can't reproduce. The worst part of the story is figuring out how to teach JR a lesson from this. It's the second time he's let Dash out and I can't seem to get it into his head how dangerous it is. Maybe I need to try convincing the OTHER end.