Lifes Little Lessons

Day 4. I realize being sick and laid up in bed can be very aggravating and stressful to the person who has to lay there. I also realize that being sick can cause those same people to reflect more on the "bad" outcome of their illness. However, being the logically minded person I am..... I have to disagree with some of their conclusions. Cheerios will not cause your knees to hurt. Food in general is NOT the cause of your severe stomach cramps... especially when I'm feeding you two teaspoons of rice every hour. (Your stomach issues are because you're starving) During recovery the patient should listen to the person who drove 18 hours to take care of them..... RIGHT?? Is is against the law to tie the Mother-in-law to her bed? Is it immoral to suggest duct tape as a means of acquiring some silence and less argumentative complaining. I guess I just don't understand human thinking. Dogs are much easier to work with. Patient:

My Cholesterol levels are all screwed up." "One of the side effects of one of the pills I take is sore muscles and back pain, so I'm not taking that one anymore." "I do want to take more of my high blood pressure meds though, so double my next dose." "For dinner tonight I want tuna with boiled eggs and a little wedge.... I MEAN LITTLE Wedge of mozzarella cheese."

Me:

Here's your Dinner....

Patient:

"I'm not hungry.... my stomach hurts...." "hand me the scissors"

Me:

WTH????

Patient:

"It's cold in here... turn off the ceiling fan". "I can't lay in this bed anymore.... OOOOUUUCCCCHHHHHH "My back hurts.... and I'm hot now" "Are you two going to eat and just leave me to find my own?"

Me:

WTH????

I don't guess it's all that bad. The house is air-conditioned. Dash n Roux aren't allowed in the house, but they have a great patio to lay on. It's covered and all screened in. They come into my room at night to sleep. I'm gonna take them to the beach one day this week.... maybe tonight. No matter how aggravating certain situations are or certain people might be in the upcoming weeks.... I have to keep reminding myself that I can walk out and go for a drive. I can eat watever I want without stomach pain. I Can Poop. It's only for 11 more days and I will be headed back home. Just 5 days and 7+hrs from now Steve will join me here and I can take a break. I will say this.... If one more christian calls here and prays for her on speaker phone.... I may be ill. This much god and goodness has to be some sort of southern style torture. I need liquor...Anybody have any suggestions?!?!?!?